Feeling: The awkward moment when you're very curious to know who you've pissed off in the past, and why.
I'm not kidding. James came over today to keep to his promise about my guitar springs. Last month he got out my acoustic guitar to play and broke a string and he promised to fix them. Last night Tuesday was in town and he stopped over and I was just annoyed at a lot of people and so we sorted that out wonderfully.
Anyways, he was fixing my strings and we started talking about people pissing us off sort of, and I asked him if I'd ever done that to him. He said no but I have done it to people before.
So, you know, obviously I'm painfully curious now. It's more interesting than finding out who likes me [although I don't think anyone does...?], although he won't say.
Now growing up, I tried to make things easier for others. I tried not to argue but let people step over me for what they wanted. I kept a lot of my opinions and questions to myself, just so I wouldn't bother people. In fact, I could completely override my own emotions just for others.
-Then I realized that was wrong, your feelings always matter no wonder the case, and I guess I flipped all the way around, to sort of not caring.
I'm a bit more blunt now. You can't read my expression half the time so I look upset, sad, or angry [apparently, I wouldn't know] and my humor's just gotten a bit more dry. Oh, and I'm a little more blunt about the company I don't like.
Clues for unlikable company:
Not meeting the eye
Being distracted by everything else
Conversation continues to fall flat
No smiling
Please, I hope people start to understand clues like this. I'm pretty pro at being obvious about it lately, I believe- although I'm afraid there are some very [painfully] socially awkward people about. It's just not healthy nor right, really. At one point it just crosses the point from entertaining to just...horrible.
For our sakes:
Pay attention to the direction of the currently flowing conversation
We know you want attention, but people were talking, want to talk, so take turns
Dress well [if you're not five, then wear matching articles of clothing]
Before you say anything, repeat it to yourself
Be considerate
Too friendly is too creepy
And that's just a starter. Okay, so some say fashion doesn't have to do with who you are- but who are they kidding? In this society, we make snap judgments and label people within the first few seconds of meeting- not minutes, but seconds. I, personally, feel I'm pretty good at figuring people out and I'm rarely, if ever, wrong.
Okay, so I was wrong, once. But only slightly.
The way you dress describes who you are. Wearing Juicy is like wearing fake prada- it's a brand but it's not that quality so you look like you're trying to climb up the chain. With something like Prada or Vuiton [???who cares??], you look a bit like a snob. If your clothes don't match, you probably look five and thus socially incapable of anything. If you're dressed super down without hair done, you look tired, hectic, and somewhat poor. If you wear a constantly visible belt buckle and cowboy boots, you're most likely a [wanna be] hick.
Yes, I'm talking to you, Utah.
Now, this mostly amuses me, actually. My roommates come from Wyoming, Utah and Texas where we all believe the cowboys, real or not, began. They all like cowboys. And I don't. Which I sort of pride myself on now, although I'd probably take a liking to any man from a Louis L'Amour book, to be honest.
But really, now. Hunting, riding horses... they're all the same. It's a little disturbing, and I don't find it attractive, to be quite frank.
Of course, I don't necessarily find a man in a business suit and buzz cut attractive. The latter never is, in my view. Nor are sweats attractive [that goes for girls also] Well, I'm not necessarily attracted to any man in a suit- unless it's Ryan Gosling in 'Crazy Stupid Love.' And a man in a loose tie and rolled up sleeves could pull off with a skinny tie.
Then again, I always was picky. What can I say? I have high standards. I don't want to hang around just anyone. After all, you do come to be a lot like those that surround you. So, I try to be surrounded around more of... quality, I suppose you could say?
Hey, no one's perfect...
This was an interesting post. I'll probably come back to it someday and laugh. I blame this strangeness on Psych, which I watch daily. A few episodes a day, to be honest. A little unhealthy I guess, we'll see.
However I'm finally working on a proper outline of my novel. I wanted this done by the end of November, although I doubt that will happen. Though I do hope to get a bit farther- I don't want this to take years in the making. I've already spent three years on it, and I don't want much more because it deserves to truly progress and finish becoming.
Enough ranting.
Other news: I'm finally beginning to understand my Physics class, thank goodness. And I'm selling a few items over the web to make some money and it's slowly working.
BIG NEWS: Next semester I'm moving to Orlando, Florida! Not going to school, exactly= the Disney [World] College Program. January 11- May 11 2012, I will be working on the Attractions- not sure which one[s] yet!- at the park. I'll have an ID there so I can get in when I want. I'll have housing nearby with a bus that will take me to work for free everyday and to the grocery store down the street. I'll also be taking a course, most likely about the innovation of business, and it may be taught by high business executives and the like. I can't wait :)
So no, it's not school. And I won't come back with much money [hello, disney world, and trips to universal studios!!!], but I believe it's important for me to properly "fly the coop." Not like a criminal, but to finally go alone into the world and learn that way. Everything I've ever done was with either of my sisters or a friend, and doing this, I won't personally know anyone at first in the program.
Very terrifying. But I've fasted and I've prayed to Heavenly Father, and we've both decided together that it's something I need to do!
Feel free to visit me. I can get discounts, if you ever want to go to a park or something. Or just visit me. Please. Haha
Have a swell day, my sweets.
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